'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
