I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
