Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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