I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
