i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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