You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
