Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
