Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I DEMAND FORESKIN
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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