At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
