Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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