Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
