So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
