My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Sacagawea was the original milf.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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