Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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