my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
