If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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