bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
