margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
