The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i dont even know how to be here
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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