WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
