Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Randomize
