So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
