its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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