my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I touched a dick in church today
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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