Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
