I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
