there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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