32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
