glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
