In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
