No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
