My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
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