There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
