I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
