Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
