Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
