I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
