She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
