I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
