Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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