how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
