Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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