no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
