the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
