bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i drank out of a bidet.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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