Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Drunk is a universal language darling
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize