Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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