Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
