I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize