two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
