dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
this hospital has no fireball
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
