new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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