I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
